Fed-up bride tells sister-in-law to 'Shut it about Bridgerton' while they're wedding dress shopping, complains her wedding is being hijacked: 'Sounds like you are marrying into a controlling family'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Oct 30, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

Wedding dress shopping can be a high-stress activity. Everyone might have a different vision of what they'd like the bride to wear. Ultimately, obviously, it's the bride's decision. But if someone else is paying for the wedding, things might get hairy. Clothes are important, and your wedding dress is arguably the most important garment you'll wear in your life. At the very least, it's probably the most expensive. So it's no wonder that shopping for them often puts us in places of high stress. We might say things that we don't mean, or snap at people who wish us no harm. 

That's what happened in this situation when a bride-to-be found herself at war with her soon-to-be family. And funnily enough, a certain Netflix original TV show got wrapped up in all the drama. Who would have thought? Read on for the story and decide who you think was in the right. 

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10421542656
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story

  • 02
    AITA for telling my SIL to shut it about Bridgerton because I hate it.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 03
    I (25f) went wedding dress shopping a few days ago. It was a shitshow. My fiancé is from a religious family and it was important for him to get married at his family's church. It's not something I always wanted for myself, but his family is helping to pay for the ceremony and this means a lot to him.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 04
    The problem is that his mom insists that I get a modest wedding dress. I tried on a bunch of dresses that were "modest" and I hated them. I don't like puffy sleeves. I hate looking covered up. I look like Princess Leia if she were from Alabama, not Alderaan. This is not what I wanted.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 05
    It was my mom, my SIL and MIL and my MOH at the bridal shop. They were trying to cheer me up, but I wasn't having it. My sister in law Peggy was the worst. She loves shows like Bridgerton. Anyone who knows me knows I can't stand that show. She kept hyping up how my dress make me look like someone from the show. After four or five dresses, I was fed and up wanted to call it quits. But she wanted me to try on one more.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 06
    I snapped at her. I told her to shut up about Bridgerton and I don't want to hear about that show again for the rest of the day. We ended up leaving after this. Peggy was upset and she and her mom just left. My mom is p ed at me and said what I did was not acceptable.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 07
    I'm just frustrated because it feels like everyone is hijacking the whole wedding process and I don't even have a say about what I want. It's like this wedding is more about what Peggy and my MIL want.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 08
    OscarnBennyesmom · 22h ago • • Sounds like you are marrying into a controlling family is that what you really want?
    via u/OscarnBennyesmom
  • 09
    LadyWhistleDont OP 21h ago • • I'm going to be honest, the last few months I've been thinking that I don't want to get married. At least, not right now.
    via u/LadyWhistleDont
  • 10
    lemonlimeandginger 21h ago. You might want to bring that up with your fiancé really soon then.
    via u/lemonlimeandginger
  • 11
    ThreeDogs2022 • 22h ago. NTA but you need to slow this entire roll. Are you actually ok with getting married in this church? Is it something you're doing to make your spouse happy that you're neutral about (which is fine) or is it something that you're doing that you actively have a problem with (which is not?).
    via u/ThreeDogs2022
  • 12
    Assuming you're actually ok with the venue, call the administrative staff and ask if there are any formal requirements about dress for the venue (some traditional places might for example not allow bared shoulders etc). Keeping any venue requirements in mind, pick out your own dress.
    via u/ThreeDogs2022
  • 13
    If you can't afford the wedding you're having without nutty bullying by the in laws, scale back to something you can personally afford. to pay for. This is NOT worth it.
    via u/ThreeDogs2022
  • 14
    plm56 • 22h ago • NTA But this is a preview of your life going forward, with your in-laws running the show. House? Gotta be close enough that they can visit. Kids? MIL knows how they need to be raised. Is that what you want?
    via u/plm56
  • 15
    DungeonCrawler-Donut 21h ago • • NTA but it's not about bridgerton, it's about you feeling you're not in control of the wedding and quite possibly the marriage. You need to discuss this with your OH and spend some time really considering what you want.
    via u/DungeonCrawler-Donut
  • 16
    Sea-Professor-5859 21h ago • I think you could have delivered the message more kindly, but it's not the issue here. As others have said, this is just the tip of the iceberg for your life after marriage. 25 is pretty young to be making this kind of commitment, given that your brain is only just starting to approach being fully formed and functional.
    via u/Sea-Professor-5859
  • 17
    I would sit your fiancé down and work on a compromise that actually WORKS for you both. You're okay with a church wedding, but you won't wear a modest dress that you hate. It's his job to communicate that and stand up for you re his family. If they won't agree, then this isn't the marriage for you. It's a huge red flag for your in laws to believe they own your body. Imagine if you have a child together and they force you to give birth at home with no pain management for instance! Ab...e is ab_e.
    via u/Sea-Professor-5859
  • 18
    You also need to ask him some really hard and important questions about his own religious beliefs. Does he support you in using birth control or having an abortion? Do you actually agree on how religion will play a role in any future children's upbringing? Does he want to stand up for you and your values when they don't align with his mother's?
    via u/Sea-Professor-5859
  • 19
    • Mayalestrange ⚫ 21h ago YTA, Your sister in law isn't the one hijacking things and it's not her fault you and your fiance don't have the backbone to stand up for yourselves. She was just trying to be positive and hype you up. You directed your anger at her for things that are not her fault. You should apologize to her directly for that. You could have told her calmly that you're not a fan of Bridgerton styles so it's not the vibe you want to see after the first one or two times so she would st
    via u/Mayalestrange
  • 20
    • pamelaonthego 22h ago. ESH. Your in laws for pressuring you to try on dresses that you don't like and you for being r de to your SIL who was genuinely trying to make things better. Elope and be done with the nonsense, or at least downsize the wedding to only very close friends and family so you can afford it on your own.
    via u/pamelaonthego
  • 21
    BeeJackson 21h ago • • YTA - You took your anger out on the wrong person because you have no control over your wedding (and maybe relationship). If you don't want a church wedding or to wear an ugly dress then woman up and say so. If you are in a relationship where you constantly have to compromise or ignore your wants and needs then have that conversation with your fiancé and decide if this marriage will work long term. That family is only going to get worse. Good luck!
    via u/BeeJackson
  • 22
    • PurpleStar1965 21h ago • Don't take their money. Pay for what you and fiancé can afford. Then, maybe, they will understand they don't have a say in things. Honestly, they sound exhausting. And they will be up in your bizness for the duration of your marriage. When they express their opinions - remember the southern phrase - "Bless your heart".
    via u/PurpleStar1965

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